Jester Quest: Hawk: Tuah - HOMESTUCK.NET

Hawk: Tuah

Your ASTRAL HAWK releases a mighty TUAH. You brace for the shockwaves of cringe emanating from this dated meme.

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09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Jester: ALACK WITH THOSE LUDICROUS GARBS, GET RID

09/11/25 - Jester: IT IS BECOMING UNBEARABLY HOT IN HERE. PLEASE DO AWAY WITH YOUR CLOTHING. TO AVOID OVERHEATING.

09/11/25 - Jester: IT IS OBVIOUS YOUR LESS-THAN-STELLAR BEDIZENRY IMPEDES YOUR MOVEMENT. MAKE HASTE AND DISCARD YOUR CLOTHES AT ONCE. PLEASE?

09/11/25 - Jester: IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS HOLY. I DEMAND THAT YOU REMOVE YOUR GARMENTS, PLEASE

09/11/25 - Jester: OOOH, HERES AN IDEA! UNDRESS. YES YES! THIS IS MOST IMPERATIVE. YOU MUST BEGIN WITH. HMMM. LETTING YOUR JESTERLY REAR FACE THE OPEN AIR. FOR VENTILATION PURPOSES? YES. QUICKLY NOW

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Jester: impress jollacrity with some crazy plot shit introducing like 5 to 6 new meters and mechanics

09/11/25 - Jester: do a sick one rep max heavy as shit bench press to amaze jollacrity with your mirthful muscles

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Jester: Stress out over the fact Jollacrity probably saw your Very Humorous dance earlier. You looked very silly.

09/11/25 - Jester: Approach JOLLACRITY

09/11/25 - Next.

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09/11/25 - Jester: Hide from your feelings inside your Command Fort.

09/11/25 - Next.

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09/11/25 - Jester: Throw bust at bunker door

09/11/25 - Jester: Place Hella jester next to togore

09/11/25 - Next.

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09/11/25 - Jester: Look for your cyanide pills only to realize that they were unfortunately used in some unknown shenanigans between when you were Past Jester and when you started being Future Jester.

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - One of the Jester: say hi to Shrek 🙂 and eridan too i guess idc

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Jester: Suddenly remember your quirky bunker-mate Poffy who has been just out of view this whole time.

09/11/25 - Jester: Eat CHIRP CRICKET.

09/11/25 - Next.

09/11/25 - Jester: try to use chirp cricket to block out Jollacrity

09/10/25 - Jester: Realize her name was JOLLACRITY all along and immediately correct all previous mentions of a PROTREPTIC RHAPSODIST. There was never anything like that you think. Anyone else saying otherwise must clearly be braindead, and should seek counseling with a nearby stump and a gun immediately.

09/10/25 - Jester: Ask the PROTREPTIC RHAPSODIST if she is single.

09/10/25 - Next.

09/10/25 - Jester: Be future Jester

09/10/25 - Jester: Be yourself 20 minutes from now

09/10/25 - Next.

09/10/25 - Jester: continue to stop being the other guy

09/09/25 - Next.

09/09/25 - Hawk: Tuah

09/09/25 - Jester: Reference an irrelevant popular internet culture meme with excruciating lateness and make everybody hate you faster than you can say "cejestial tulpa".

09/09/25 - Next.

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09/09/25 - Weed Jester: Do another very humorous dance that pleases significantly less people

09/09/25 - Jester: Be WEED JESTER.

09/09/25 - Next.

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09/09/25 - Next.

09/09/25 - Jester: Hit your vape in an attempt to create a METAL JESTER heavy enough to fall into the comic properly.

09/09/25 - Build SPAMGORG

09/09/25 - Jester: Have your food lovers engage in sweet, passionate love

09/09/25 - Next.

09/09/25 - Jester: Ponder the possibility of a second, smaller bunker made of used cans for your lovers. They may desire privacy.

09/09/25 - Next.

09/09/25 - Jester: Assemble the spam cans into a memorial for the most recent tragedy in your memory of American history, one you'll never forget.

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Jester: Smoke a fat one and begin the spiritual journey toward summoning your cejestial tulpa

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Jester: Consult the first pages of Jester Quest to find your next course of action.

09/08/25 - Jester: Do a very humorous dance that pleases everyone

09/08/25 - Next.

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09/08/25 - Jester: Check Bard Quest one more time, just to be safe.

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Form a Jester Lover out of beans and Spam.

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Jester: Throw a tantrum and spill beans all over the keyboard in a brash moment of overreaction.

09/08/25 - Next.

09/08/25 - Jester: Heed Protreptic Rhapsodist.

09/07/25 - Click the latest page.

09/07/25 - Click first page.

09/07/25 - Reflect remorsefully on your squandered life.

09/07/25 - Click LOG.

09/07/25 - Next.

09/07/25 - Jester Quest