June 2014

Oh dear sweet Lord, Calliope and Lord English are the same species. 

Her brother loves games, and he’s cruel beyond imagining…he’s Lord English, isn’t he? Fuck fuck fuck.

He managed to win after his king was checkmated, and Lord English found some key to indestructibility…Nnnngh.

I can’t stop reading tumut phonetically, like tuh-mutt, even though I know it’s a guy putting up both middle fingers.

Yep, he is definitely in the same room as her.

Jesus christ, have I really been reading this long? Eeeek.

OH MY GOD SHE HAS ROSE’S BOOK. The one where Rose chronicled everything. That’s how she knows so much!

Oh my god it’s Dave’s and Karkat’s love chart and penis doodles! 

This is totally to make fun of the fandom. Also lol, “could they be his depiction of bones?” Well, one kind of bone!

Oh.

My.

God.

This has to be part of what Doc Scratch told Gamzee to do. She has no idea, because he covered up all the details. Oh man, she’s got the information right there in her hands but she can’t read it. 

OH GOD. OH GOD NO.

Whatever you do, do not captalogue it! Keep that book out of baby Lord English’s hands!

So, it says there are three quadrants which are completely alien to her. Obviously we know that matesprite is off the table. Is she basically locked in a perpetual moraillegance with her brother? She is very nice and kind, and he is like pure fucking malicious evil, And they are basically chained together… 

I guess I can’t complain too much about this particular withholding, since we’ve suddenly had so much information revealed. I can be patient.

!!!!!!!!!!

That’s why Calmesis had the two chains! And why the chains have their symbols on them, Calliope unlocks one, to keep uu chained up, and uu unlocks the other, to keep Calliope chained.

So, now I’m going with: two dream selves, one waking body. 

WELL THAT LOOKS REALLY FUCKING FAMILIAR.

Also it’s called a sarswapagus. So, yeah.

Well, there you go. 

I’m figuring this has something to do with the Green Sun, at least metaphorically. Massive red sun? Mmhmm.

Oh.

My. 

God.

OH.

MY. 

GOD.

She’s on Earth? That big red sun is our sun, dying? About to consume the planet? What the fuck.

Wait, we definitely only have one of those. Right now anyway. 

Fuuuuuuuuuck.

I’m guessinghoping that since the view screens blacked out, our heroes aren’t actually dead, and Lord English uu is just imagining things incorrectly.

Good thinking, Strider! Because we know Jake is too stupid to get out of there on his own.

Ohmygod.

uu is seeing Jake in a helmet that looks like uu’s head, wearing a shirt with his face on it, and maybe later he’ll even see Jake wearing his coat. 

Oh man, could Lord English’s name be another cause-effect loop, where Jake got his name from Lord English who got his name from Jake? 

Lets all take a moment to laugh at his stupid bowtie. 

The cherubim face has totally stopped being scary to me. It’s actually kind of cute, in a way.

Oh man, I love this whole Toph Beifong type joke, where Terezi (or Toph) can’t see but she can sense well enough that people don’t realize or forget it, and she’s just totally deadpan about it. 

Also ohmygod, Meenah on the floor with her legs in the air, totally overcome with how awesome her alternate self is. So awesome that she can get pummeled and not give a flying fuck.

Also, Terezi is sniffing the heck out of Dirk because he smells kind of like Dave, right? And Dave is seeing his bro, except as his peer, and ohmygod I just realized that the reason the alpha kids are entering the game a few years older than the beta kids did is so that they’ll be the same age when they meet up.

God, uu, you’re just saying that because he drew you completely unerotic, g-rated not-porn.

But the other jujus haven’t entered their universe yet! Is he like, preparing the universe for their jujus, by getting Dirk to destroy his? Is this how Lord English prepares/will prepare universes for his entrance or something?

Augh, and now we know why uu wanted Dirk to destroy Lil Cal. Well, or at least we know that it wasn’t because he wanted to protect Dirk or anything.

I’m not sure what’s going on with Rose’s expression there, but I loooove Dave’s. A+ to the art for being able to express all that emotion in such a minimalist design of a guy wearing glasses. 

Also I love any interaction with Rose, Kanaya, and Dave. Kanaya’s face right there is just perfect. 

AH! So now I really understand what everybody meant when they said that Roxy was unique in being able to enter dream bubbles without being dead herself. It is a unique ability. Cool.

Dirk is too cool~

Also I noticed he didn’t even try to prototype any kernelsprites! Yeesh, people, terrible idea!

Is that a frog pinata? 

HOLY.

FUCKING.

SHIT.

Oh my god, guys, Lord English didn’t just have one leg because of Andrew’s avatar shaking the shit out of Doc Scratch, he chewed his own leg off. Oh, Calliope was right to be worried that she’d never wake up again. But did she expect her brother would try to put a hole in paradox space itself?

So Caliborn/Lord English has possibly not slept since that flash. I am guessing, because I like to think that if Calliope had the body again, she would do whatever she could to prevent her brother from destroying everything. It would  explain why Lord English looks so fucking unhinged all the time–much more unhinged than little Caliborn did, although he was a scary motherfucker in his own right. Being immortal and invincible is probably enough to drive a person crazy, anyway.

Although that’s kind of mundane, I’m thinking about whether Lord English could be pure evil driven insane, what with the connecting imagery between him and Giygas of Earthbound. 

I kind of hate the character art for this flash game. Ucky.

Also haha Doc Scratch reference.

I kiiiiind of super love that expression, though. Aradia, I had no idea you were such a cornball!

I am totally digging the horse_ebooks references. Dave is so ironically adorable.

Aranea looks adorable in this art, though. 

I love hashtag commentary. Pointing out the jokes juuuuuust in case.

Oh my god Meenah’s face. She looks so happy! And innocent! So innocently violent. 

!!!!!!!!

Good thinking, Aranea! Go get Calliope to help take out Lord English! I mean, if only they knew her name. Not that that would necessarily work at this point, if Caliborn took over the body entirely and she got cast into the Furthest Ring. But it seems like quite the Chekhov’s gun to tell Roxy her name and how to use it on Caliborn, and then have it completely not work or anything. 

Troll Isaac Newton jokes will probably never stop amusing me. 

…Oh. Does this mean that the net force the meteor will end up meeting is the Earth? Since we did see it there…

I’m pretty sure there’s a lot of actual self pity under all that ~irony~.

Can’t blame him, even before he entered the medium, his life was pretty fucked up. 

Oh my god, Kankri is a tumblr user who is taking their second diversity class in college. 

Wooow. 

I’m disappointed Karkat’s brain seems to have stopped working, I really want him to slap Kankri. And swear at him, a lot.

I am definitely a member of the Meenah fan club. Look at that glorious righteous rage over Lord English mistreating women (er, on top of his general murderousness). That is some amazing imagery. 

*facepalm*

Seriously, Aranea? She’s anosmic, that’s not particularly disabling. God, no wonder they lost the game, they’re pathetic. 

Yaaaaaay, we get to escape the boring trolls and go back to John and his adventures trapped on a boat flying through like…no-space!

What the shit.